Sunday, November 29, 2009

take two. or eleventy bajillion.

Let's try this again, shall we?

Okay. After all this time of not writing anything in this space, it's really been on my mind for quite a while. It's easier than a paper notebook/journal, seeing as how I can go back and edit whatever I said and there'll be no record of what I wrote earlier. Although it IS kind of neat to go back and re-read journal entries that you scribbled down days or months or years before. (Personally, I always examine my handwriting when I do that, trying to tell if I was in a hurry or if I took the time to form my letters carefully because I consider myself to be a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to my own script.)

Although-TANGENT-one time, a few years ago, I found one of my old journals from 7th grade and cracked it open to an entry I had written about some crush I had on some boy and I nearly rolled my eyes clear out of my head from the ridiculousness of it all. I vowed then and there to never-NEVER-read any of my previous entries in any of my journals. I have mostly kept this vow.

A few days ago I volunteered to help my boyfriend do some research for an English paper. The paper is supposed to be an ethnography about a subculture-any subculture. (Side note: Why do English professors love to be so vague with the instructions for their assignments? I want an A, you want me to get an A [I hope], so just tell me what you want already, dammit.) So off I went to the local college library at 10:30 on a Saturday morning to look up articles regarding-wait for it-Appalachia.

Oh. Yes. (Side note: SARCASM.)

When I realized that I loved finding obscure articles for an obscure topic, I became a little depressed. Yes, the best part of college is the freedom and the friendships, but for me, one of the best parts was the learning.

That's right. LEARNING. I said it.

I miss feeling the gears of my brain turn, reading for comprehension and details, analyzing texts, figuring out how an article fits into a thesis. When I started finding those articles, it was like putting on my new glasses for the first time: I felt a little woozy at first, but I noticed the trees had individual leaves! On the branches! Not just big blobs of green! What?! That's crazy! Who knew?

Same thing with the articles: I remembered words I hadn't used or read in months, things were making sense, and I kept having one [brilliant] idea after another. It was fricking excellent.

I want to go to there. Again.

Written by an English major who really should expand her vocabulary.